Separating Without Court: A Quick Guide

Most couples can settle their affairs without a judge. While a divorce order requires a court, your parenting and financial arrangements do not have to be decided there unless you cannot reach an agreement.

Why Avoid Court?

• Cost: It is significantly more expensive than mediation.

• Time: Court cases can drag on for months or years.

• Stress: The process is often adversarial and emotionally draining.

• Control: In court, a judge decides your future; in an agreement, you do.

1. Parenting Arrangements

If you can agree on how to care for your children, you have three main paths:

• Informal Agreement: A simple verbal "handshake" deal.

• Parenting Plan: A written, signed document (flexible but not legally binding).

• Consent Order: A written agreement approved by the court, making it legally binding.

Note: Australian law usually requires you to try Family Dispute Resolution (Mediation) before you can ask a court for parenting orders.

2. Money and Property

You are encouraged to divide assets yourself. Before filing for a court settlement, you must show you made a "genuine effort" to resolve things via mediation or lawyers.

Ways to Finalize Property Division:OptionDescriptionIs it legally binding?Informal AgreementA private deal between you and your ex.No. Either party can change their mind later.Financial AgreementA written contract (no court approval needed).Yes. Requires strict legal rules and mandatory legal advice.Consent OrderAn agreement filed with and approved by the court.Yes. It has the same power as a court-ordered judgment.